


Pinescone AU Drabbles

by AvidReader3019



Category: Gravity Falls, Over the Garden Wall (Cartoon & Comics)
Genre: Adult Dipper Pines, Alpha Dipper, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Beast Wirt, Dragon Wirt, Ficlet Collection, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Knight Dipper, Omega Wirt, just some short things, lumberjack Dipper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:40:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29640354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvidReader3019/pseuds/AvidReader3019
Summary: Various little snippets from AUs I've considered but likely won't write an entire universe for and some for ones I already have but this part doesn't fit into the plot or was an alternate timeline idea. Each chapter is different and will have a little context in the summary.
Relationships: Dipper Pines/Wirt (Over the Garden Wall)
Kudos: 14





	1. Woodcarving (Lumberjack AU)

**Author's Note:**

> Wanted to post some ideas and things I've worked on? Most of these I've already shared on discord and I guess I just wanted them here too.

Dipper is standing hands behind his back, face glowing crimson when Wirt walks in. Now, it could be explained by the heat from the fire, but there’s something about the way his eyes dart around the room while his teeth cling to his bottom lip like a lifeline, that signals it's more than just the heat.

Wirt tilts his head and steps forward resulting in Dipper taking a step back. He tries again and another step away. 

"H-hey Wirt uh why-- what are you doing here?"

He shifts uncomfortably, torn between curiosity and apprehension. "I thought I'd come see you since I finally finished editing; figured we could celebrate."

"Oh! That's uh-- that's great." Dipper's words scream enthusiasm, but the way his voice stays low and monotone, the fact that he seems particularly interested in the composition of the floor, the way his arms seem to be twitching behind his back nervously. He wants to be anywhere but here 

"I thought you-- I thought the deadline wasn't until a few days from now?"

Wirt swallows his increasing panic and tries to keep his voice steady. "Well it is, but I got finished early. You know I've been doing this non-stop..." 

He trails off. That has to be it. Of course he's upset and confused at Wirt's presence. They haven't gotten together in oh goodness how long has it been? And he's probably gotten used to Wirt not being around or maybe realized it's better without him around--

"Yeah you really have."

There's something in Dipper's tone that throws him off. It's not.... angry or upset like he expected. He sounds simply affirming, voice reduced to a whisper, nearly desperate. Wirt tries another step forward and this time Dipper doesn't step away. He seems to lean forward, but then his arms move to further be concealed by his broad chest and he blinks rapidly. 

Wirt isn't sure if it's the obvious guilt and embarrassment, or the lack of anger that does it, but he feels a rush of confidence and curiosity to ask. "Can I-- What's behind your back?" Dipper hiding things isn't exactly a new occurrence, but hiding them from Wirt is. If Dipper says he doesn't wanna talk about it then okay that's fine and Wirt hopes that one day he'll trust him enough to tell him, but, if he's being anxious like they both get about something that's really not a big deal, then he'd like to help as soon as possible. 

Honestly, now that Wirt is considering all the possibilities, the most likely is that Dipper got injured again and is trying to hide it. He was probably in the middle of bandaging it up and when he walked in and doesn't wanna have to fess up to doing something stupid even though Wirt always helps and just adores hearing about all of his "stupid" misadventures.

Dipper laughs nervously and tries to bring a hand up to his neck before realizing and fiercely concealing it once again. "Behind my back? I-I don't know what you mean. I don't even have a back! Wait no. Come on Wirt what would I be hiding? What are you hiding? That's the better question." Dipper coughs and the red is crawling down his neck now.

Wirt fixes his boyfriend with a heated glare, now fully aware Dipper has done something and it's not great by the way he's acting. His brain can't decide whether to prepare for giving a lecture or tender care while he strides forward, and Dipper matches him step for step until they're both standing against the wall.

Wirt straightens, no matter how strong Dipper is, he will always have the height advantage. "Dipper."

Dipper meets Wirt's eyes with the determination of a staring contest and tightens his hands behind his back. "hmm?"

"What are you hiding? If something's wrong I wanna help, but if you just don't wanna tell me, that's fine. I won't push you about it if you really want me to stop."

Dipper's eyes don't move but a hint of playfulness emerges. His mask of innocence shifts into a smile, and Wirt knows he's allowed to proceed with the questioning. Dipper shrugs. "I don't know what you're talking about. Plenty of people stand with their hands behind their back. I hear it's all the rage nowadays."

Alright time to pull out the big guns. He just finished an entire book of poetry and he's tired. Wirt came all the way here to spend some time with his boyfriend and instead of getting pizza and cuddling Dipper is being ridiculous and apparently trying to give him a heart attack,  _ for fun _ . He drops his voice an octave, raises his arms to box Dipper in, and fixes him with the most searing look he can manage. "Mason. Tell me."

Dipper shivers at first, closing his eyes for a moment, but then his smile widens. "I said I don't know what you're talking about." His eyes flicker to Wirt's arms and he looks more delighted than threatened.

Wirt taps a finger against his chin. "Hmm... Well, in that case, you wouldn't mind letting me see those gorgeous hands of yours would you?"

Before Dipper can stutter out a response, he continues.

"It's been so long since I've seen them, since I've seen any of you, but those hands... I've watched those strong, capable hands do so many incredible things. I'd love to run my fingers over the textures, softer than they should be, certainly more than anyone expects." Wirt's eyes soften and he drops his arms back down to his sides. He doesn't even have to really exaggerate, he loves every part of Dipper and wants to become reacquainted, but he also wants to know what he's hiding and knows just how to find out, he’s a sucker for flattery no matter how much he tries to hide it, but he’s very picky about  _ what _ the compliments can be about to really startle him.

Dipper's cheeks glow pink, illuminated by the light of the fire, and Wirt presses in. He moves to stand on Dipper's left and Dipper turns as he moves, keeping his front to Wirt at all times. 

"Such a hard worker, how do you manage to keep them so soft? Or perhaps I'm misremembering. It has been what feels like eons since I've felt them, but I swear I remember amidst the callouses and scars from your heroic ventures, there being a distinct, ever-present smoothness."

He pauses. "They reflect you, really. All rough around the edges until someone gets close enough to find out just how adorable and gentle you really are. How you'll crumble easily with some well placed compliments and attention."

Dipper doesn't realize the plan until it's too late. Wirt has been moving closer and closer, readying his arms, tensing, and most importantly, keeping Dipper thoroughly distracted so he can make his move. Wirt lunges and tackles Dipper to the ground, something he normally wouldn't be able to manage, but Dipper was practically boneless upon hearing his words.

Wirt tries to reach around his back, but finds he doesn't have to when Dipper brings his hands into view of his own accord, curled around something. His eyes are wide and panicked, seemingly checking for any damage

"No no no,  _ please _ ." Dipper turns it over in his hands and releases a breath, letting his head fall back to rest on the floor.

Wirt looks down at Dipper's hands and sees a small piece of wood, barely larger than his hand. It's rough looking and vaguely carved into a kind of cylindrical shape, but it's more square than a cylinder should ever be. He can't tell the specifics because it's still mostly hidden by Dipper's fist. Speaking of which, that fist is quickly enveloped in his other hand completely hiding the piece from sight. Wirt gives Dipper a questioning look that's met with wide eyes.

"It's not a big deal, okay? It's nothing."

Wirt moves to just sit on Dipper, he can take it, freeing up his hands to gently prod at Dipper's to open. He relents easily, but his face is full of fear and apprehension. "Look, I didn't-- I needed something to do with the extra wood lying around, a-and I got bored and it's so stupid and dumb and you weren't supposed to see it... It's not even finished! This was the last one I mean uh-- wait! I wasn't it's not like I was working on it or anything-- Just had a spare two minutes and kept my hands busy nothing important--"

Wirt would be smiling at his babbling, but his attention is consumed by the carving, and now that he can see it, that's what he realizes it is. It's the boxcar of a train, a very small, obviously hand-carved, boxcar. That must have been where his model went, a couple of his model trains went missing a while ago, but Dipper must have been using it as an example. It’s rough, obviously someone who’s never done this before, but the effort put in it is clear. He must have spent days on this if not weeks, and Wirt can’t do anything but stare at it in wide-eyed wonder. "Dipper this is--"

"Yeah, I know, it looks horrible. Just ignore it, I don't even know why I did it." He makes a move to grab it but Wirt holds it out of his reach.

"No I this-- You made this for  _ me _ ?"

Dipper starts picking at his nails and shrugs. "I uh maybe? Do you hate it? You can be honest.”

Wirt shakes his head so violently it makes him a little dizzy. “Are you kidding me? This is the nicest-- I-- I can’t believe--” His vision is blurry and Wirt realizes it may have not been from the dizziness. “You spent that much time making something just because you thought I might like it? Mason the gesture alone is-- I can’t tell you how much this means to me. If I wasn’t so burnt out after the past-- No you know what hold on this deserves poetry just wait a minute.” He scrambles off Dipper and walks out of the room, presumably in search of some kind of notebook, but he runs back skidding a little and presses a kiss to Dipper’s lips before running out again. Dipper’s frozen for a second before he laughs and goes to grab the rest of the set, excited to watch Wirt break.


	2. Roles? Fitting in? Nah. (Abo type AU)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dipper's an alpha and Wirt's an omega, but neither of them really fit the behavior they're supposed to have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this AU is really fun and was like hey Dipper as an alpha exists almost nowhere so why not try it but with a twist? I'm bad at summaries and notes please forgive me.

Wirt is back underneath the roughly  _ five _ blankets before he finally sighs and throws his book onto the space beside him, sliding his glasses off as well. "Hey Dipper?"

He's still wearing a hole in the carpet pacing like he has been for hours now and Wirt has ignored him up to this point, used to Dipper working himself up while researching and needing to think. He's better left alone in these states, but uh Wirt doesn't want or need all the blankets and Dipper doesn't usually just throw stuff at him while digging through other rooms if he's just doing research. At least, he hasn't before now, so something is probably wrong.

Wirt was unwilling to say no while Dipper seemed so agitated. Hell, when he tried to slide one off it resulted in a growl that left him wide eyed so he said "ooh-kay" and put it back, pretending to read while assessing Dipper's behavior more closely. Wirt doesn't mind, really, having something that smells like Dipper is nice, comforting to the instincts he loathes on principle alone and just ignores most of the time, but why can't  _ Dipper _ lay on him instead of the blankets?  _ That would be nice. _ But no he's busy wandering like a madman in search of  _ more _ blankets apparently, but why _? _

Wirt can't think of anything that would have caused this and without another distraction, his mind is free to wander and conjure up unlikely scenarios ranging from him being cold and hoping warming Wirt would somehow fix it (which doesn’t make any sense) to he's leaving and doesn't know how to approach the subject. The first is ridiculous, so while the second isn't likely and he has no reason to assume Dipper would want to, well, wait, doesn't he though?

Wirt's knows he's not an ideal mate, not falling into the role he's supposed to. He's more independent and stubborn than he has any right to be, but Dipper isn't as aggressive and commanding as he ought to be, so it works? He’s always thought so... But maybe Dipper realized Wirt isn't worth the hassle? Maybe he wants someone he can...

.

No that's crazy he would've said something and he's never made any indication of being unhappy, quite the opposite actually. Plus, Dipper can't keep a secret worth anything, he spoils the ends of books and movies like it's his job to do so, so a major life decision wouldn't have gone quietly. But then, what is all this?

Dipper walks back into the room and Wirt notices his eyes for the first time,  _ really _ notices. He's kept his head down until now, but when Wirt speaks, he snaps to attention and Wirt can finally see how red and puffy his eyes are, accentuated with rings under them so dark they look like bruises, hair is sticking up in a million directions, signature cap gone for the moment...

Wirt is crossing the room to meet him in an instant "Mason what's wrong? What happened?" He brings his hands to grab Dipper's and realizes they're shaking. Wirt feels a protective surge within him that heats his blood and sharpens his attention, rivaling everything he was taught about how he's "supposed" to work, but this isn't some stupid instinct this is pure raw emotion. A response to seeing the love of his life hurting. He searches Dipper's face for answers and only gets him shaking his head and trying to weakly escape Wirt's hold and push him back on the little blanket nest--

_ Oh. _

"Were you trying to--" But then why would he be crying? No that's stupid, once again Wirt is lost on a problem Dipper probably could have solved instantly in his position. He's crying and trying to suffocate Wirt in fluff... It makes  _ zero sense _ , but Dipper still seems insistent on walking Wirt back over to the couch, so Wirt, keeping their hands interlocked, slowly walks back and brings Dipper to sit with him, crawling back under the blankets when Dipper looks back and forth between him and them with pleading eyes.

That seems to soothe him a little and he exhales shakily, trying to wipe away the tears still falling slowly down his face, but Wirt's fingers replace his.

Dipper flinches back and pushes Wirt's hands away crossing his arms and folding in on himself. He stands again and moves to walk out of the room, but Wirt okay he'll admit it he makes a hit below the belt, but Dipper is acting weird and he keeps leaving and all the pacing back and forth, and the worry that Dipper is leaving him leaves Wirt feeling distressed enough for the small noise he makes to be 100% genuine. It should stop any alpha in their tracks instantly, especially  _ his _ .

Dipper stills immediately and Wirt allows himself a second to cheer in his head, thinking he might've snapped him out of it, but then Dipper's shoulders are shaking and his hands are clenching and unclenching and Wirt gets the impression that he may have made it worse. This theory is only confirmed when Dipper turns around with a look of horror and bolts out of the room. "Dipper--  _ Mason _ \-- Wait, come back, I'm sorry!"

He follows him as best he can, height making up for the slower pace, and pulls Dipper into a loose hold when he catches up. Dipper tries to keep a distance for a second, but gives in and collapses into Wirt's chest, sobbing. "Shh it's okay hey it's fine we're fine look I'm okay I'm sorry I shouldn't've I didn't mean I didn't know that would--" Wirt is just rambling but he can't stop and tears form in his eyes. "Well I knew it would get you to quit but I didn't know it would hurt-- I'm so sorry please tell me what's wrong maybe I can help? If it's a huge monster thing I probably can't do much, but I could call Mabel she's like stronger than both of us combined times ten that would work and we can hang out here and watch movies did you still-- There's supposed to be some ghost marathon of something or other I was gonna ask if you wanted to--"

"Damn it Wirt,  _ that's the problem _ " He pauses to sniffle and wipe at his eyes again, but it doesn't do any good. "I'm supposed to be taking care of  _ you _ . That's what-- A  _ good  _ alpha would do..."

He wipes his own tears away with his sweater sleeve and then smacks Dipper with it on the chest gently. "You idiot." He’s laughing though because of course Dipper just got hung up on--

"Ow! What? Hey--"

"You made me worry about you. I was worried but you’re just--" Wirt takes a second to breathe and collect his thoughts without somehow strangling Dipper. He's so fucking stupid sometimes. Someone had to of said something to him and while Wirt doesn't have any muscle mass he can ruin a person's will to live with his words alone and boy does he have some strong ones for whoever caused all this. Or maybe Dipper just was reading or watching something and oh that's probably more likely. Everyone calls Wirt the romantic, but Dipper is the one who goes all idealistic and starry eyed every time they watch a rom com.

Either way, Dipper’s crying in his arms and he can’t really— Helping him won’t work since apparently Dipper doesn’t want his help right now, the stubborn… He’s not mad at Dipper, just, society in general for making up these stupid ideals in media and social environments and making his mate constantly worried about matching up to something he shoudln’t even be required to meet in the first place Wirt wants Dipper, not some— If he wanted a big strong alpha stereotype there’s a million thick headed idiots out there he could have settled for, but he  _ didn’t _ . Wirt was fully prepared to die alone after everything he’d been taught and shown about how alphas were. All he knew is no one would want him unless they were an alpha tempted by something he has no control over, but tried to dampen as much as possible, and that they would be domineering and aggressive. That’s why Dipper was such a shock.

The night they met Wirt had been approached by several  _ very _ drunk people and refused all of them. He’d been dragged out with Greg something something karaoke and been reading in the corner just waiting to go home. In comes Dipper. Wirt hadn’t noticed much about him at first other than that strong evergreen scent that marked him very clearly as an alpha, but it did have this weird undertone that Wirt actually didn’t mind? Something like leather and ink, the smell of an ancient library hidden by time. He’d shoved those thoughts down rather quickly because again an  _ alpha _ was approaching him and well… He definitely didn’t want that and not again that night from someone who doesn’t know how to take no for an answer, so Wirt had come in pretty hard. Dipper barely managed to take a breath before he interrupted.

“No nothing hurts since I didn’t fall. I’m an eleven thank you very much, and I’m more like a hot tea than a tall glass of water. And besides, like, why is boring, clear water considered-- Is that supposed to be a compliment? It’s not great if it is... and just I’m clearly-- I specifically wore a shirt with “this is a day to leave me alone” printed on the front and I’m nearly done with this book, so I’m not sure how on earth I’m giving off a ‘please alpha approach me’ vibe. But I’d really appreciate it if you told your friends I wasn’t interested so there isn’t another contest, that was hell and congrats on being brave enough to come over, but I’m not interested.”

If Wirt had been a little less assuming of Dipper’s motives, he might have noticed that he walked up with one hand occupied with rubbing along the back of his neck and the other anxiously twirling a book. His posture was slouched as if even at a whole head below Wirt’s height he was still trying to appear as small and unassuming as possible. He’d been wearing a hoodie similar to Wirt’s own that practically screamed the same message. He clearly didn’t want to be there, and thankfully instead of running like anyone reasonable he managed to stay under Wirt’s seething glare.

“Oh uh I’m sorry to uh bother you it’s I didn’t— it’s clear you wanna be left alone, but uhm I saw you uh you were reading book two in this series?” He held up his book for emphasis and Wirt’s jar nearly dropped to the floor. “So I have three with me, just finished actually over there in the uh other corner and I know they’re all out of the library right now because I went there first and then hit up the bookstore because I couldn’t wait and I was gonna see if you wanted to maybe borrow-? Or I can just leave if you want, still?” 

Dipper had pulled his hat lower and tugged on the hoodie strings, trying to bury himself in it, cheeks reddening more and more as he rambled and Wirt was enchanted. He was being approached. By a person, a cute person who likes the same books and gets adorably flustered when met with—- He’d been gone the minute Dipper finished his little rant and he hasn’t come back since. He invited him to sit down with somewhere near a million apologies and a promise to make up for it sometime. An invitation that had turned into a few dates. They’d easily come together over shared interests even from the start, so Wirt hates that some dumb arbitrary expectations are able to make him all worried like this. He hates that pressure Dipper’s constantly under and that him trying to relieve some of it and share the burden like a partener should, only increases that pressure.

"Dipper do you think-- Did you choose to be with me because you thought I'd make a good omega?"

Dipper who'd been sniffling and blowing his nose on his sleeve, (trying to save face by doing the exact opposite) stills and looks at Wirt with the same caution one would have while staring at something about to kill them. "I uh.. That question feels like a trap."

"Yeah it is, but humor me."

Dipper considers and the decision at the very least seems to calm him considerably. He likes puzzles, problem solving and Wirt just tossed him one as a life raft to the overthinking threatening to drown him. "No? Yes? I initially asked you out because I just like  _ you _ , Wirt, and that has nothing to do with your omega-ness and everything to do with your dumb tortured poet aesthetic."

Wirt smiles and cups his face, running his thumbs along Dipper’s cheekbones. "Then why would you think I give a single fuck about how much of a "good alpha" you are? You're a good Dipper or person I mean...." Wirt runs his hands through Dipper's hair, and continues with renewed attention when he leans into that touch.

"Look, see? That right there. You let me just do stuff like this and are you supposed to? Probably not, but it works for us. This is good for us… Dipper you’re perfect for me in every way. I’m a little more involved than I should be as far as the whole protecting thing goes, but I like to think we look out for one another and that seems sweet to me… I don’t care what anyone else thinks about what roles we’re supposed to be fulfilling when everything about this is so perfect. If you’d said you wanted me to back off a little I might be sorta hurt but I would’ve listened unless I thought it was unreasonable, but I’m willing to bet that’s not the case?”

Dipper sighs and shakes his head. “No it was just-- Everyone was talking about all the nests they’d made for their mates in the past and I was like man those sound really cool we should do that, but then somewhere over the few days it turned into just I don’t do enough do I? I mean I don’t make you nests. What kind of a pathetic excuse for an alpha can’t even--”

“Yes you do what on Earth are you talking about? Like a week or so ago like we literally were cuddled up in a blanket fort all day--”

He frowns. “That’s not a--”

“My instincts said it was”

Dipper blinks and stares at the wall blankly. “Really?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Oh.” He still hasn’t moved his stare, but Wirt can see the gears turning in his head and decides to take advantage.

“You take care of me just fine, but... you take care of everyone else to and I like to think that my way of taking care of you sometimes includes not being-- I don’t need constant attention, I’ll be fine on my own and I’ll follow or watch you do your thing while I do mine. It’s perfect really and I wouldn’t have agreed to be with you if you were one of those overbearing alphas who was breathing down my neck all the time. I love being close to you, but I love getting a choice and I bet all those people bragging to you didn’t even ask. You on the other hand always mention maybe wanting a blanket fort night and I know you love them as much as I do if not more.”

“Y-yeah I do.”

“And that’s okay I want you to be your soft and cute and adorable self around me because I wouldn’t have mated with anyone else. I’m here for the blanket forts Dipper, but I didn’t need to be buried alive.”

He winces and scoots away, but Wirt pulls him right back. “M’sorry.”

“It is not at all your fault okay? And there’s worse things than having a mate who cares about you, oh the horror.” He laughs. “But you care for me in our own quirky way that I’m really fond of and if you wanna change it? Great let’s talk about it, but if you’re doing it because someone else was being a dick for no reason well… Don’t ever do a damn thing you don’t want to life is hard enough already.”

“And that’s why you’re the poet.”

“I guess it is.”

They return to the blanket pile and both fall asleep in each other’s arms.


	3. Wirt causes problems on purpose (Dragon AU)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Medieval Fantasy AU... Or is it? Basically Wirt is a dragon that was guarding a castle and Dipper was the knight sent to slay him until he realized dating the dragon was more fun than just killing him. (Also Dragons have a human form and Wirt uses that most of the time)

Dipper steps forward poking at the area in front of him with his sword. He can feel something in this room, but there don't seem to be any runes-- There's a low growl and suddenly he's being shoved back, feeling heat surrounding him, no wait,  _ them _ . Wirt is in front of him, halfway into dragon form, covered in scales and taking on most of the blast. Dipper presses himself to his back and waits for the fire to subside.

Once it does he exhales shakily and steps around Wirt, now back in human form. His hands are running along Dipper's sides checking for any damage. "Wirt I'm fine. Look, see?" He spins around once, arms raised. "You got in front of it just in-- Hey uh Wirt? How did you know where the fire would come from"

Wirt is still not listening, walking circles around him to check for any sort of wound. Dipper grabs his hands and meets his still slitted steel gray eyes, a mark of his inhumanity even like this. "hmmm?"

"You jumped in front of the blast before it was even triggered, how did you know what direction it would come from?"

Wirt's eyes widen and he looks down, brushing at his sweater absentmindedly. "Oh uh I uhm... I know where all the spells and things are."

"What? Wait how is that--"

"Dipper I'm a dragon, I can see them."

Dipper freezes thinking if there have been any close calls before this, nothing like this, but he almost-- "You-- you could-- this whole time? And you didn't say anything?"

Wirt rolls his eyes. "Oh don't get all-- you said you didn't want my help."

Dipper's jaw drops. "Since when have you ever done a damn thing I asked you to? I've been stumbling around hitting things with my sword like an idiot while you knew where they all were this entire time You thought it was hilarious, you've been laughing at me this entire time. Here I am trying to woo my boyfriend and he-- I can't belive you. Actually, no, yes I can. This is normal. Of fucking course-- Unbelievable..." Dipper storms ahead to the next twist in the cave and Wirt follows close behind, smug if the warmth Dipper feels against his back is any indication. Not only did he save his mate, he outsmarted a knight. He must be practically glowing right now.

"Maybe next time you'll let me help"

Oh that's it. Dipper turns and prods at his chest with the tip of his sword. "Wirt. what if I-- You've been barely paying attention what if I hit something? Ever think about that!? What if you weren't paying attention and I died, how good would you feel then knowing you could have prevented it by just talking to me?"

Wirt snorts and crosses his arms, Dipper ignores how cool it is watching the smoke as he exhales. He's no, he's not cool right now he sucks. Dipper's glare deepens. 

"You really think I'd let anything in this cave touch you?"

"...Okay that's a fair point, but still Wirt, come on. You could have said something!"

Wirt lifts his chin and straightens to look down on the knight and he knows how much Dipper hates it, but--"Let me help and I'll tell you where everything is at... On one condition: I get to do this my way, none of your moral knight code bullshit."

"Wirt it's not bullshit!! it's about honor and if I don't follow a code I'm no better than--" They've had this debate a million times and if he hasn't convinced him before he's definitely not going to now. Dipper draws a hand over his face and feels one of the bracelets Wirt keeps forcing him to wear. It's perfect, genius. He almost feels bad for using Wirt's nature against him, but, eh he deserves it at this point. "How about I use the money we get from returning the ring to buy you that book set when we get back?"

Wirt's previously bored, smug expression fills with genuine interest. "The one with the gilded pages?"

Dipper nods.

"Well, then, in that case..." Wirt steps in front of him and pushes Dipper's sword down. "Back up, you're about two inches from having an avalanche of rocks collapse on top of us."


	4. Recovery (Dragon AU)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dipper got attacked by a dragon and like super hurt. This is what happens after.

Dipper blinks his eyes open to see that he's been asleep for far less time than expected. It can only be around midnight with it being this dark and easy to watch the stars. They're shifting and swirling in a way stars shouldn't, can't. This has to be a dream.

He props up on his elbows and tries to get up, but he's reminded of all the injuries that scream at him and okay not a dream, those don't hurt. The gashes across his abdomen are burning and the only thing that doesn't seem to be pain are his eyes, probably because of the lack of light. The stars are soft and comforting as always, as much as they can be when he's hurting like this.

Note to self, don't try to stand a couple hours after getting ripped open by a dragon. He groans in pain, laying back, but feels something tighten around him, restraining his movement completely. There's a low growling and he finally notices how hot it is, soothing his muscles a little at least...  _ Wirt _

He had to have come and gotten him, that's the only explanation for why he isn't dead right now. Dipper thought the tavern would be safe but it seems someone heard about the most incompetent knight ever and decided to take one out. The less knights the better as far as dragons are concerned, well, usually...

Dipper starts trying to wriggle out of the hold, but doesn't get very far before the growling gets louder to the point that Dipper can now feel the vibration through Wirt's wings. 

"Oh no, you're staying right here until you're healed, don't even think about it." His words are teasing, but Dipper can hear the strain in his voice. 

"Just let me see you at least."

The air heats up and the apparent stars start swirling faster. "No. I-- Dipper please. For once stop being difficult, just focus on getting better. Besides, you shouldn't want to see me after what I allowed to happen and I--"

"Wirt it's not your fault! I was attacked and walked right into a trap like the idiot I am, that's not on you!"

"Yes it is" There's a sigh and Dipper watches the stars move as the wings shudder above him. "You are  _ mine _ . I will do anything within my power to protect you and no one.  _ No One _ touches what belongs to a dragon. Especially not me." There's heavy labored breathing and as Dipper's eyes adjust to the low light he notices that some of the stars seem to be covered by some sort of red...  _ oh no _ .

"Wirt you want me to feel better, right?"

He almost sounds offended. "Of course"

Dipper suppresses the urge to roll his eyes. "Then let me see you,  **_you_ ** make me feel better. I want to see you."

"Just, don't be--" He sighs and mumbles. "And to think, I spent so long trying to convince you that I wasn't like this, only to confirm what you always knew..." Slowly the wings come down and Dipper gasps as he shoots forward, ignoring the agonizing pain because Wirt is covered in blood. His first thought is to check for injuries, but he realizes that may not be the case if he's sitting here... "Oh, Wirt. You didn't have to--"

Slitted, fierce eyes meet his own, burning with rage. "I didn't do anything other than what was absolutely necessary." His tone is chilling and emotionless and there's so few times he really embodies the creature Dipper was told dragons truly are... 

Dipper notices the dried blood staining his claws, but there's also deep scratches down his arm and the ones on his chest-- Well, to put it simply, if he were human, he wouldn't be breathing. The blood is clearly a mix of his own and the other dragon's which explains how there's so much. 

Dipper reaches out to touch and check, but Wirt flinches away. "You don't need to-- Don’t--  _ Please  _ I just got you back." Dipper notices the tears in his eyes. "If you think this is bad... You were so much worse. I didn't know if you would wake up-- and I could hear your heart beating, but you wouldn't wake up and I just got you clean and-- I can't see you covered in blood again. I can't. I'm sorry I'm too weak and I can't. I'm begging you, don't."

"...okay." Dipper places his hands firmly against his sides and lays back down, exhausted just from the strength it took to sit up for those few moments. There's silence and the temperature goes back to a comforting warmth as they just breathe together.

"What happened while I was unconscious?"

Wirt thinks back to the events of the past few hours. He barely remembers most of it. There was a moment where he was fine and then in the next he was watching someone touch what is his and not only touch, oh, he would have ripped their wings off just for touching but no they had to hurt. In an instant he was overtaken by rage and instinct and all he knows is the next time he was walking on two legs was when he was covered head-to-toe in blood and torn flesh while staring at a smoking patch of dirt that will most definitely never be capable of growing anything ever again.

"Um well..."

He remembers the smell of burning and suppressing both the urge to throw up and the pride slowly filling him at what he'd done. Wishing that he'd been a little more of himself to draw out the pain and torture the creature that dare mess with his.

"It wasn't-- you didn't miss a lot really..."

Picking Dipper up in his blood-soaked claws and flying him home faster than he's ever flown. Listening to nothing other than his heartbeat, counting the seconds between them. The relief when he didn't die on the way. Slowly, gently laying him down on his sweaters and getting water to clean the blood off. Barely keeping himself from having a panic attack while categorizing all the wounds, the only thing keeping him from losing himself being that Dipper wouldn't survive if he did.

"You can tell me the truth. It won't change how I feel about you."

Wirt shrugs, feigning indifference, suppressing the dark pride and satisfaction . "I think I ate most of him, burned whatever was left beyond recognition, and carried you back."

The silence stretches for more than a few tense moments and Wirt contemplates shifting back just so he can use more facial expressions to communicate. If he weren't overtaken by the desire to keep his mate safe, he'd do it, but as it stands the only thing keeping him mildly sane is the fact that he's tensed and ready in the strongest state he can possibly be in should anything happen. 

He knows logically that they're fine but he can't help the need. It's bad enough they're laying on as much of his hordes as he could manage to grab while carrying Dipper and he's mostly just thankful he hasn't noticed yet...

"...wow."

"Yeah."

The silence resumes and it's suffocating. Dipper shouldn't be talking at all, but after so many hours of listening to nothing but his heartbeat and shallow breathing, his voice is, well, it's been Wirt's favorite thing to listen to, but now it's-- He needs this, he can't go back to the nothing, he can't. 

He'd do anything to keep hearing it, he hadn't quite known for sure until he blinked his eyes open and found himself covered in the blood of another dragon, bloodlust finally sated, hunger gone completely, for the first time he can remember, just cradling a beaten and broken Dipper in his arms. He'd gone and fallen in love with a human, truly the weakest of his kind, and worst of all... Given the option? He knows he wouldn't change a thing.

Wirt laughs bitterly. "Wanna revise your earlier statement?"

Dipper tilts his head and the fact that he can do that at all-- "What do you mean?"

"You said it wouldn't change how you felt about me, knowing that I-- well that I'm-- What I did."

.

"Oh." Dipper moves to twirl the blanket around his fingers and realizes the things under him aren't blankets at all. He smiles, but it's bittersweet. Of course Wirt would do this... He feels around and finds, yep, he thinks he can feel a book, the edge of a clock, some sort of cool material he assumes is a teacup... Wirt must have brought everything with him and thrown Dipper on top, which would be extremely cute if it weren't for the fact that even with Dipper aware of what he is now he tries to hide impulses like this. He wouldn't do something this extreme unless he was really hurting and Dipper finally finds the words... "Yeah I guess I do want to revise..."

Wirt braces himself for the reaction, for the realization that he really is every bit the monster he used to think he was. For the person who convinced him that maybe he wasn't to see him that way--

"I am hopelessly infatuated with you, always have been, but now you gone and made it a million times worse." Dipper shakes his head, ignoring the dizzy feeling. He's getting better at ignoring the whole pain thing, maybe he'll make an okay knight one day after all. Well, if you ignore the whole being-in-love-with-a-dragon-rather-than-killing-it thing, just uh, besides that. "I hope you're real proud of yourself because I'm never going away now. There's no way you're going to be able to get rid of me."

_ What? _

"Dipper, did you not hear what I said? I destroyed--"

"Oh, don't remind me, I'm already swooning. I thought I was supposed to be the one defending your honor, but I'm definitely not complaining. That was wow and the... Hell, I almost wish I could have watched."

He's hoping the light tone will help, but the worry in Wirt's eyes hasn't lessened and it's possible he's worried about there being brain damage now, okay, time to switch tactics. "Look, Wirt, when I said nothing could change my mind I meant it, a-and if you can't see how incredible it is that you just not only saved my life but didn't leave my side afterwards..." _ And obliterated the one who did it _ "Then, I'll just have to find some way to prove it to you. I'm in this for the long haul, no matter what. There's nothing you could do to change my mind, absolutely nothing."

"I-I'm Dipper... This isn't-- It's not-- You can't mean that. I'm not even--" He folds his wings and presses in on himself, looking smaller than any dragon should. "But if that's how you feel I won't stop you. I'll give you anything. I would fly up and collect the stars if you asked me to, just so you could see them up close. I'd burn the world to the ground, just say the word."

"Wirt"

"I need you to be okay, no matter what it takes. That's all I ever want and they-- He-- And I wasn't there-- Why wasn't I there?" He twists and brings his face to hover inches away from Dipper's. You're-- I'm never leaving your side again. No one is going to hurt you, or even touch you without my express--"

Dipper raises an eyebrow.

"I mean unless you want, of course, I uh--"

Dipper's laugh cuts him off and a hand runs along Wirt's scales. The knight lowers his voice to a whisper, filling it with a fraction of the love and awe he feels. " _ Beautiful _ What did I ever do to deserve you?"

The response is immediate, without hesitation. "You existed. That's more than enough, more than I ever hoped for."


	5. The Bunny Army (Beast!Wirt AU)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beast!Wirt AU where he chose to go back to the Unknown. Dipper finds his way there and goes looking for the new creature he's been hearing so much about.

“So you’re the scary child-eating monster huh?” Wirt startles and nearly falls out of the tree he’s climbing out of, having just finished repairing a nest in the higher branches. His  ~~ claws  ~~ _hands_ shake as he finishes climbing all the way down to face the newcomer. The human smiles and steps forward, no caution accompanying his words, just a slight bounce to his step, a curiosity.

Wirt swallows. “I-I uh I wouldn’t exactly say—“ He winces and tries to back away, looking for a path that will get him out of this confrontation. This is why he stays away from the main roads, but he’d hoped to get the last few nests that had been disturbed by the raging storm fixed up before calling it a night. He even waited until the shadows were thickest and gave them permission to cling like a second skin while he worked, but he’s still been found because why not spice things up a bit?

He’s really trying to look on the bright side, he wanted this, begged to do this, and he loves what he does usually... as long as no humans come up with harsh words and harsher weapons. 

He’s managed to avoid people for the most part, easy since they’re content to stay away from “the beast”, which he _isn’t,_ but word hasn’t spread everywhere yet and every so often you get a curious soul like this one, but usually not this unarmed?

The stranger isn’t attacking and his movements don’t suggest any violence, which is nice, but why else confront Wirt? The other weird part is, even the bravest and most vengeful of souls approach him with an aura of fear that nearly makes him salivate much to his dismay, but this stranger has... nothing. There’s curiosity, amusement, but they’re absent of fear while staring into a shadow darker than the void, lit by nothing more than the faintest orange glow at his side and a dim white when Wirt’s eyes catch the moonlight.

Wirt tilts his head in confusion, and catches one of the branches protruding from his temple on a nearby tree. Great. Not only has he been found, but also utterly humiliated at the same time, fantastic.

The mortal has the audacity to giggle at his plight and walk over. “Here hold still let me—“ His hands slide over Wirt’s unnatural, inhuman appendages without any sort of apprehension and Wirt stares wide-eyed, looking exactly like a deer in headlights while the man tries to help. 

Wirt could move the branches out of the way with less than a thought, but he’d rather watch this being, and pay acute attention to the feeling of his hands on him. _what is he doing? When’s the last time I was touched without an attack?_ Wirt is speechless as the stranger untangles him and steps back, cheeks a shade darker than they were before. “Yeah that just about confirms all my suspicions. You’re a hard guy to track down, _Caretaker_.”

Wirt’s breath catches. “W-where did you hear that?”

“That’s what they call you, right?” 

Wirt shakes his head and takes another careful step back. “Not usually, no. The first thing you said is more common.”

“Well sorry if I can’t see the guy who just got stuck in a tree with a bunny army as a vicious monster, my bad.”

“Looks can be deceiving— Wait bunny army?” Wirt looks down and sure enough ten little fuzzy creatures are making a protective formation around him and looking awfully fierce. He smiles and kneels down, the stranger forgotten for the moment.

They must have sensed his anxiety, it happens sometimes but he must have been really upset to get this kind of a display, although, the creatures of his forest have been getting more protective lately as he tirelessly repairs and strengthens their homes for the winter. “Hey there guys.” He’s met with twenty blinking eyes and ten auras awaiting his command. “I’m sorry if I caused you any worry, everything’s fine, I promise.” They look as skeptical as bunnies can and Wirt chews on his lower lip.

"Hey no guys... I'm alright, really. Look you trust that I can defend myself, right?" Wirt takes a deep breath and opens his mind on the exhale, enough to get the vaguest impression of the creature's thoughts. Not in like a creepy mind reading way, just enough to communicate with them. They may be able to understand the being linked to them with perfect clarity, but Wirt still has to concentrate if he wants to do the same, he's still fairly new at this after all.

There's a thrum of affirmation and he feels their anxiety ease with his own. It's hard to not let the guilt overwhelm him sometimes, having all these creatures able to pick up and respond to his thoughts, but it's also nice to be noticed for once, not forgotten like he's always been used to. 

He's never wanted spotlight by any means, but always wondered what it would be like to not be last choice, to not be completely left out of plans, not due to any ill-will, just... never remembered. And all the "oh whoops sorry"s the next day never did any good for his mental state, whispering things like _you're not even interesting enough to be hated_. He can't claim any kind of discomfort or hurt when he's not _being hurt_ and--

The bunnies are pressing against his legs shivering at his thoughts because of course he had to spiral while communicating with them. "Shhh I'm so sorry I didn't mean to..." Wirt's hands flutter nervously and he hears a gasp from the stranger in front of him, not really sure why... _He can deal with that later_ , after he fixes this. Luckily there isn't really any fixing to be done when he realizes they're not upset, they're trying to comfort him. A little blanket made of fuzz and... are they purring? Do bunnies purr? Wirt would have assumed not, but it's the unknown, who is he to question.

A breeze lazily makes itself known and Wirt smiles at the subtle warmth in it, whispering a 'thank you' before returning his attention to the stranger, while picking up one of the bunnies.

They're staring at him, mouth agape and Wirt looks down at himself, noticing for the first time that the shadows seem to have retreated, leaving him looking like, just, himself. Unimpressive and definitely nonthreatening... No wonder the forest seems to be trying to shield him, he probably looks completely incompetent, not like the predator they anticipated when he first came back. He's built for speed more than anything else, as far as inhuman features go.

He looks very human and very devoid of any defenses, well, other than his friends, but he doubts the tiny beings will be able to do any significant damage if the stranger does attack, not that he thinks they will, just, it always serves to be prepared, especially considering that's what most people seem to do--

"Are they okay?"

Wirt flinches back, curling the soft creature to his chest protectively on instinct, not quite registering the question, nor how soft and cautious their voice is now, all teasing from before gone. "What?"

"The little guys... Are they okay now? You can talk to them, right?" He kneels down and looks as the bunnies very seriously. "I'm not here to hurt anyone I _promise_. I was only curious about the creature I'd heard so much about..." 

They trail off and Wirt kneels, face still a little above the stranger's and he now notices just how much shorter the human is. "Yes I can. Uh well less like talking and more just a general feel for their-- uh I'm not sure, but they're fine now. They were just worried because I--" Wirt swallows trying to think of something less sad than 'people scare me and they can sense it' he opts to go with. "We don't get a lot of visitors is all and they're protective of uh," ~~me~~ "our forest."

He gives the bunny in his arms one last affectionate scritch between their ears before picking up another one, and _yes he plans on picking them all up, he's not a monster_ , well not in that sense anyway. Wirt's voice is a little unsteady and more than a little cautious. "Oh? W-what have you heard?"


End file.
